I mean it, what happened to that great soap opera General Hospital? Is it still on television?
Then why, I ask you, did I turn on the news this morning to get an update on the overnight headlines, but instead was treated to non-stop soap opera-like coverage of whether Barack Obama shunned Hillary Clinton by refusing to shake her hand at the State of the Union Address Monday night?
Is this what 24-hour news coverage has come to? Non-stop, wall-to-wall celebrity junk news? Jeez. Hillary was snubbed! OH MY GAWD!! What has the free world come to?
Meanwhile the Middle East is again nearing the eruption stage, Iran is still threatening to wipe Israel off the map with nuclear missiles, the dollar is all over the board on foreign markets, a "stimulus package" that has a very uncomfortable resemblance to the return of welfare is working its way through Congress, China is planning a military coup - on US! - Russia's Vladimir Putin is hoping our national focus is so drawn to nonsense that we won't be watching him hatch his latest plot, the National Organization of Women is split over Ted Kennedy endorsing Obama, but all we can report on is whether or not Hillary Clinton was snubbed!?
And that doesn't even count as a snub! You want to snub someone and be a world leader too? Then take some lessons from the Jedi Master of all world leaders and in-your-face, brass knuckle politicians.
That's right, Vice President Dick Cheney, my favorite guy in government!
When Cheney has something to say, he doesn't turn his back and use body language. He gets right up in your face and says "go f**k yourself!" Remember Sen. Patrick J. Leahy (Vt.), the ranking Democrat on the Judiciary Committee, who had the bad judgment to give Cheney lip back in 2004?
Yeah, that guy. He learned, didn't he? And guess what? Cheney's poll numbers went up, not down! Pretty much tells you what the American public thinks of twinkle-toed politicians who don't have either the backbone or intestinal fortitude to speak the truth.
Hell man, when Barack refused to acknowledge Hillary's outstretched hand, she should have grabbed him by the lapels, and growled "Hey, wise guy, one more stunt like that and you and I are going hunting with the Vice President!"
That would have jacked Barack up big time.
Oh, and while we're on the subject of sneaky snubs, did you see that photo of Barack trying to project a thoughtful pose with two fingers, the index and middle finger, up to his lips?
Yeah, well that wasn't thoughtful, that was inside politician sign language that really was a major insult to the president. Seriously. What Barack was actually thinking was, "Man if I could just drop this index finger, you'd know what I really think of you, Dude!"
Anyone who ever spent any time inside politics or out on the streets knows that. That little piece of sign language is the not-too-distant cousin of putting up three fingers - the middle finger and one on each side - and saying "camouflage!" Obviously our national news producers and reporters have led comfortable, sheltered lives.
Barack should have just come out and said it, instead of going all high-minded and sneaky. Who knows, he might have beaten Hillary in Florida!
How about instead of celebrity watching we use the dead spots in the news coverage to review things from the previous years that still are relevant?
Remember the anti-Gen. Petraeus advertisement that Move On ran in the New York Times last September? Why not a few minutes on the Democrats being invested in defeat that has turned to victory? Or is that too raw for regular coverage?
How about corn prices? Or, let's investigate whether corn-based ethanol programs are working?
Hey, I have a great idea? Why not report that John McCain beat Mitt Romney in Florida's GOP primary yesterday? That is news isn't it? And to do a really good job on the story let's follow up on the Fox News exit polls that had Romney matching McCain for the military vote?
What's up with that? A good analyst would delve into that in a heartbeat.
Nah, never happen. Yesterday's news. Far better to predict what will happen next week than to give us a solid report on what happened yesterday.
For the record - the media's prediction that Rudy Giuliani would win Florida and thus the GOP candidacy, fell flat. In fact, on the scale that was created to judge Fred Thompson's campaign, Giuliani went down through disappointing, shot past dismal, plummeted beyond embarrassing, and landed somewhere between ill-conceived and "you gotta be kidding."
Considering how few people in Florida voted for Giuliani after he spent half his lifetime and most of his fortune trying to win votes there, I could not care less who gets his endorsement, and it won't affect my decision when I vote next Tuesday at all.
Why don't you put that in your headline?
Wednesday, January 30, 2008