Fins to the left
Fins to the right
And you're the only
bait in town.

Jimmy Buffett was right on the money when he sang those lyrics to Fins, about the bar scene, but they also apply to the conduct of our Congress in Washington, D.C.

The latest victim of the "We'll investigate you until you die from a million nibbles" mentality, practiced beyond obsession by the likes of California Congressman Henry Waxman, California Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi, California Senator Barbara Boxer, and Nevada Senator Harry Reid - what the hell is in the water out there? - is now-former Attorney General Alberto Gonzales.

He pulled the plug this week after a year of endless battering by Congressional Democrats with alleged terrorist collaborator Waxman leading the charge.

Now there is more blood in the water, and you know how it is with sharks and blood. Once they get a whiff of it they go into a feeding frenzy and totally lose control. I guess that happened with Tom DeLay and Lewis "Scooter" Libby already, but the Gonzales resignation is just more evidence to support the theory.

It is probably worth noting that the voluntary departure of Karl Rove, the outgoing presidential adviser whose name was synonymous with evil as far as the left is concerned, is seen as a victory by Waxman's forces. I hope so. I don't think that is the case at all, and I love it when arrogance is rewarded with an comeuppance.

In Gonzales' case, the big deal that Democrats in Congress pushed endlessly was over the entirely legal and entirely normal firing of 8 federal prosecutors. People in that position know going in that it is a presidential appointment, based as much on politics and personality as performance and ability, and that if the president decides he wants someone else in your position, you are gone.

This happened in the opening days of the Clinton administration when he fired more than 90 federal prosecutors, nearly the entire US Attorney workforce. There was not a peep of protest from Congressional Democrats, despite their often-voiced concern over the 'excesses' of the executive branch.

Yet, in the Gonzales case, even though Waxman and his cronies in Congress held hearing after hearing, and interrogated witness after witness, they couldn't find a single thing that Gonzales did wrong - except he apparently is a far better legal scholar than witness. So they immediately began screaming that since they couldn't find anything wrong, there must be a coverup.

Yes, that is insane! It is nuts! It is outlandish! It is a waste of taxpayers money, not to mention the time of the paid public servants who are sitting through these Kangaroo Courts instead of doing their jobs!

But worse, the American Terrorist Media, the living embodiment of lap dogs and lemmings, covered the endless hearings and the ludicrous statements from Waxman and friends as if they were hearing a new set of commandments straight from the mouth of God! Without question or challenge!

I bet Harry Reid and the Merry Puppets - John Kerry and John Murtha and Ted Kennedy Nancy Pelosi, and Chuckles Schumer - were dancing a jig over their latest coup. I bet.

With more than 100 investigations thus far, and Sen. Harry Reid, abetted by Vermont Sen. Patrick Leahy and Chuckles Schumer, bragging that he'll bog Congress down with 100 more if they feel like it, I'm sure we haven't seen the end of their posturing and deliberately undermining our government. That is after all what they are doing.

Congressional Democrats haven't found anything to support their claims of illegal activities - come on, Libby was only guilty of a bad memory after the fact - but that hasn't stopped them from so poisoning the country's mood against Congress that it has lower approval ratings than pedophiles.

I get the feeling they are doing this on purpose, seeing as how they have collaborated with terrorists by broadcasting and holding press conferences outlining our tactics and strategies. These public commentaries have no valid purpose except to give our enemies hope that they can defeat us politically since they are getting hammered militarily. What better way to destroy our country and form of government than by gutting it of all purpose and common sense from within?

Yet, somehow I get the sense that maybe this isn't such a great moment for them. Let's consider for a moment a comment made a week ago when Rove was interviewed by Chris Wallace on Fox News Sunday. Rove opined on what the Congressional Democrats would do if the executive branch suddenly started issuing subpoenas for staff members of selected Senators and Congressmen.

There would be an outcry of Biblical proportions I'm sure.

But let's think about this for a minute. Why doesn't Bush start issuing subpoenas for Congressional staffers in such high profile and eminently dangerous cases as leaks of national security programs to the New York Times?

Or, how about the allegations contained in Robert "Buzz" Patterson's new book, War Crimes, that Waxman himself helped pave the way for the anti-troop, pro-terrorism organization Code Pink to deliver more than $600,000 in supplies to Al Qaeda terrorists in Fallujah, Iraq while they were fighting a pitched battle against American Marines? Maybe he should become the subject of a federal investigation rather than sitting in judgment of others, especially considering he isn't fit to take out the garbage for most of the people he has targeted for career termination.

I have a feeling that rather than knuckling under to the pressures of an out-of-control Congress, Bush may just be clearing the decks to get into it in a big way, which most of us out in America land would love. Maybe, instead of handling Congress with kid gloves, Bush is taking the gloves off, and is about to reveal that he is wearing brass knuckles.

That would be a good thing. His approval ratings would soar, we could soon be calling Congressional Democrats and their turncoat Republican allies 'knuckleheads' and have evidence to prove it. Out enemies' morale would plummet, our troop morale would soar, and fence-sitters all over the world would suddenly be dropping down on our side.

Executive branch subpoenas for Congressional staffers. What an idea. I say we start with Waxman's chief of staff and then his home office coordinator. You never know what might be squirreled away in the file cabinets back in California.

MORE ON WALLACE AND ROVE!

Last week I wrote about Rove's appearance on Fox News Sunday and how he showed why he is considered a master at media relations, especially in that he deflected question after question from Wallace that he couldn't answer without putting himself in legal jeopardy. Also, he didn't let Wallace put him on the defensive about comments he had made a few years ago.

Also discussed that day was a claim from pro-left columnist Bill Moyers that Rove was an agnostic, even though he professes to be a religious man.

Moyers wrote back to Wallace, in a missive that Wallace put on the screen this past Sunday, saying in essence that Wallace was unprofessional, and backing up his earlier story by claiming he got it from three different newspapers.

But Wallace lowered the boom on Moyers, pointing out that none of the news outlets Moyers referred to had actually interviewed Rove or had any other first-hand evidence to back up their claims, just opinions from Democratic 'sources' out to tarnish Rove's reputation.

Then Wallace took the gloves off!

He noted that the best source of information on a person's closest beliefs such as religion is the person himself. He noted that first person interviews are taught in Journalism 101, no kidding he said that, and said in effect that Moyers obviously wasn't one to let the facts get in the way of a good story!

Whoo-hoo! That was good!

Score that one big time for Wallace! Lesson? The man will take criticism if it is justified, but don't for a minute screw with his reputation or sense of professionalism. President Bush might be slow to take the gloves off, but Chris Wallace showed on Sunday that he has no fear of slugging it out over the right issue.

My read on it? If you want to screw around with Chris Wallace, come big or stay at home.

Oh, by the way. He passed the Jennifer test. That might not mean anything in the halls of Congress or inside the beltway, but around here it is a pretty ... big ... deal.